Friday, March 20, 2009 10:00 PM
back from seattle. it was a fun trip but i admit, i lost myself a few days ago. things started off well, but then suddenly things went out of plan, i couldnt think or focus. i was completely out of myself.
i thought i will be fine after my sister has come, but just after a short period of time, i returned to my old self and even worse. I dunno why or
what's wrong with me. but i always feel that i was never good enough to have someone to be proud of me. there is always in me that i am lacking and i was never good. i know i am not perfect but i was never even good enough. my sister never been proud of me. she never said that she has a good sister that she can be proud of. i know im lacking something buti dunno. i never a good person to be depended on. even my friend told me as an older sister, i should
be able to stuff and take care of everything. and she told me that im not
the type of person who do that. why can i be more mature and more
independent? why my parents need to push me everytime. i do get fed up sometime. im tired too.but those words simply can't come out easily.
i thought my break would make feel better. but how come i feel completely
opposite...why do everything have to be like this? why do i grew up to be a failure? is it justmy fate or God has other plan for me? again i'm completely lost....
"Father, Please hold my hand and never let it go, for I have lost my own way home."
Credit:house1027@deviantart.com
memories brings back happy moments
