Monday, March 31, 2008 9:37 PM
After being hurt several times, i simply can't trust people easily. there's always a block when i seperate myself to someone close to me. As you can see, you can't simply trust a person just by their look. There's always a person with an innocent and sweet looking, who simply have a devil-like heart that likes to hurt other people just to protect themselves from being hurt. Hahaha..funny why do these kind of people exist. as for me, i feel like im straight kind of person. if people hurt me, i would HATE them no matter what. I would be so MEAN that they would never be able to be friend with me. and most of all, YOU WOULD NEVER GAIN MY TRUST BACK AGAIN. that's simply me, you can change that even with you faked smile and innocent look. my anger just filled my mind right now. yet it won't bother me at all. SOME PEOPLE JUST DUNNO HOW TO SHUT THE F*** UP!they just pissed me off so badly. We'll see what happend. im not the person you think i am, 'cuz i'm not like you.currently listening: Paramore - Crush Crush Crush
memories brings back happy moments
1:48 PM
OK, i just got back from bloomie cup. it was exhausting, yet exciting at the same time. hahaha...but i slept the whole way through the way home. sorry, van! hehehe...Our volleyball team won twice and lost twice. same with the basketball team. it think. not really sure though. hmmm...wad else should i talk about. didn't meet koko, cuz as usual, he gave me all the reasons that he cannot meet me. well, that's ok, dun really think about it at all. at least i got to meet my other friends too. and also i talk with papi for an hour i think regarding something important.got a bad dream last night. about a guy trying to approach and i just couldn't take it and left becuz i was scared. damn! why do i have to get all of these dream all the time. Didn't i tell you i wasn't ready. ok, i am scared. I am just not ready for a relationship. I still wanna play, pepz! please lar, let me enjoy my singleness.heard something bad, gonna make clear of it later. well, gotta be more serious now. I wanna made a promise to my parents that i can ace this semester despite of the trouble i have cause. keep my fingers crossed and pray. hope God Will help me accomplish this.Currently listening: Ice Box-OMarion
memories brings back happy moments
Friday, March 28, 2008 12:17 AM
Just finishing talking to my little sister, ner2. She got me thinking about making decision whether I should be with this guy or not. ok specifically, mr Gamer. ok. i told her that i'm just not ready in a relationship. I guess, unless someone can show me how so that eventually, i'll be ready. but i dunno. when she gives her reasons, it got me thinking, maybe i should just go for it. i dunno.Well, he did make me nervous and all each time i tried to talk to him. but maybe it's just a crush, i dunno. I need help from papi and he's not even helping me the right way i want him to be. well i dunno... got me thinking alot.i'll probably decide sooner or later. I mean it's gonna be a long distance relationship. it got both pros n cons. and i dunno. maybe i think too much of the future. to me, he's almost perfect. i guess.currently listening: Ari - Dicintai 'tuk Disakiti
memories brings back happy moments
Tuesday, March 25, 2008 11:19 PM
I think i complain alot about how my life has been so far. complicated, miserable and filled the ideas of WTH...hahaha get wad i mean.There's always one thing that my mom always ask me to do. She told me that I was gifted with many good things. I'm tall, I have a fair skin, I'm multitalented and many other things, but it's just that there's always one thing that I can never do. I can never love myself. I dunno why and I dunno how. It's just that I simply couldn't do it. I mean, I hardly take care of myself and guess how i ended up, i often got sick. OMG...maybe it's not an easy thing to do. Aften christmas n spring break, my weight started to increase...TERRIBLE TERRIBLE TERRIBLE ok, i'm gonna start my DIET tomorrow, and I think i'm serious with it. well, wish me luck ppl, hopefully i can lost about 10-15 kg...hahaha..which unlikely the possible way. but at least, if i shed a few kgs, it's already made me thrilled. must strained myself from eating outsides and eating snacks...btw, stop blamming me, i never force you to do anything. don;'t blame others for wad you have done.currently listening: Asal Kau Tahu - Laluna
memories brings back happy moments
Monday, March 24, 2008 11:06 PM
I'm back from spring break pepz. and let me update you with what have been happening. during spring break, the events were great, even if there's been things that made me think we are not meant to be going on this trip, like the car accident and window crack, bad weather. yet, overall, we are home safely, aren't we?Now i can find the common thing among Mr Sleepyhead, Mr Gamer and Mr Nice Guy. They all play basketball. hehehehe...ok, pity Mr Sleepyhead, he sprained his ankle while playing basketball. After talking to papi yesterday, we asked me, who i prefer out of the 3, of course, Mr Gamer. To me, he simply the most handsome. hahaha...he's cute. ok. maybe he's not other ppl type, but i think he can fit in my type.It's funny, my mom asked me if i had a boyfriend. well, of course if i do, i would have told her right away,but since currently, i don't have one and not really looking for one. then i would say i don't have. simple right. hahaha...thinking about has been going on, there are many things in life we simply can't understand. there are people who kept bugging us all the time, that make us pissed and other people that simple don't understand about themselves as they always think about themselves. this remind me of the blog i wrote before about people being fake. I wrote it while i was back in DVC.here goes :"my life is full of jokes as most of the people live around me are being faked...
i admit...i was fake myself...in this world, we had no idea who is really real anyways..cuz we dunno anyone except ourselves...
what i mean by being faked is that pretending...some people wears "branded things" to show that they are rich....of course all of us, who had money, like to be in the centre of attention where people around you admired of how much money u had...well..let me makes this clear..IT'S NOT YOUR MONEY..IT'S YOUR PARENTS MONEY....well, that's not ur money if u still get allowance from your parents to buy things...
for 17 years of my life, i met lots of people who adored money...all of us do...including me...sometimes...dun you prefer to be friends with the rich ones so that you can also be in their crowd...hahaha...i had thought about that to last time...but most of the time...this "pretending, just rich or show off rich people" MAKE ME SICK...
so wad if u had a mercedes or BMW...or you wear Gucci or Prada to school...or u wear Tiffany Co jewellery...well..let me ask u..did u buy this mostly for yourself...or you bought it just to show other people that i wear"branded things"
you know, i knew someone who buy branded things just so that he/she can be seen in the same level as the rich people...if me...i dun really like branded things...most of them bored me...all of the things that i wear...they are not really branded...well..they are jsust normal things that an average student from a working class family could afford...even if i do have branded things, they are obviously given from my parents. doe! wateva!
am i from a rich family? well...i wish...but i'm not...iyet i thank my parents for letting me the chance to go to school here...not only i get to go to school here...i also get allowance...not all the people from the smae level as my family get the chance to doi that to...
I had friends who are from rich family...well...i dun look at them or be friends with them because they are rich...no..of course because we had some common personality that we can share...
WELL..i'm glad to know that i'm not as Fake as them..."
mine the writing. I wrote this like 2 years ago while i was living in my immature lives. ok, back to reality man. Today, i have skool. OMG, why?!? hahahaha... well, anywayz, to someone who only think about themselves and always think that they are the right ones out of all people, and always speak about themselves, please man, shut the hell up, im tired of listening to you brumbling about your problem. you think other people don't have their own problem is it. Come on, man! Look around you and face the reality, PLease Grow up, you are no longer a kid!
Quote of the day: “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” – by Marianne Williamson
Currently Listening: Fade Away - Olivia Ong
memories brings back happy moments
Sunday, March 9, 2008 12:41 PM
OK, yesterday, i had this terrible stomachache which then lead to terrible diarrhea...argh..hate it. i dunno the reason why i had it. after hours of struggling all i did was lying on my bed with my laptop in front of me plus a bottle of water and a bottle of minyak kayu putih. ok. then when i was aboout to sleep my mommy called. THank God, finally, i'm suffering right now. my mom told me to drink some medicine plus a little of cure from my little bro, sebbie...hehehe he kept saying "...Nuna~~ I lophe you~~~" OMG, i was so happy that i was in tears...well, there's something i wanna say today. well, i kinda wanna say to someone..."WHy do you have to comment everything that I do or have?" haiz...ok..there i said it...Currently listening: Ashanti - The Way that I love you
memories brings back happy moments
Thursday, March 6, 2008 10:40 PM
I baked miso fish for lunch and guess what i had for dinner....spaghetti salmon. It was my first time cooking it and it was simple delish! hahaha..of course, i kinda proud of my own cooking, cuz i put a little bit of love in every dish that i cook. so...wad do u think...looks mouth watering right...hahaha...i wanna eat it again..maybe tomorrow..hehehewell, been addicted to books recently and kinda finish like 2 novels this week...ahaha..AMAZING...im starting on my third one..and probably i'll finish like the 4 novels that i just bought last week after spring break...wad can i say? when i start reading, it simply hard to make me stop.just wanna say, really hate people who is "kepo", you know a.k.a busy body...haiz..i found them annoying..and as you might have notice. im a very sensitive person. once you made me mad, you know you'll be sorry, cause i would ignore you, won't talk to you and do anything that will hurt you. see how mean i can be. well, that's simply me. so...just beware..
memories brings back happy moments
Sunday, March 2, 2008 11:38 PM
3 days of more than 5 hours of studying and only 2 nights of 6 hours sleeping with the help of borders cookies and cream, starbuck grande caramal machiato and sentri hot mocca mix with french vanilla...still it is not enough to study finance.OK, it's a hectic. but thank GOD, im not stressed. i mean if im stress, I usually got this painful headache that wont allow me to study. hate that weekends over and it's almost monday again. kinda looking forward for spring break. i guess. not much to write today. just that i miss my adorable muffin. she's so cute!
memories brings back happy moments
I baked miso fish for lunch and guess what i had for dinner....spaghetti salmon. It was my first time cooking it and it was simple delish! hahaha..of course, i kinda proud of my own cooking, cuz i put a little bit of love in every dish that i cook. 
