Sunday, March 8, 2009 11:20 PM
no more pretending, no more faking, i am more freely to be who i am. there's no longer a person telling me what to do. I am who I wanna be. it's more freely that why. less worries.
a few days ago, i come upon his profile in facebook. It's been 2 years, that I've decided to forget about him. But it was hard. as soon I saw his face again, the memories came back and the feeling returns. I haven't talk with him for a while and the last time i saw him was summer 2007. It was awkward for me to even talk to him, because he has a gf already. I cried myself wanting to forget about him for 3 days. i finally manage to move on, but the feeling is not easily be gone. of course it will be hard, the feeling of 12 years, wont disappear easily, will it? oh Gosh... i wonder how he's doing right now?
Now i see what I should have seen long time ago. I already knew it was coming. the friendship was not real after all. they put me into struggles that i have decided to solve by myself. luckily i was smart enough to not rely on people. i can see people are hiding something or whispering to each other trying to cover up something for me. being exclusive. hahaha...ya whatever they do, i don't care. even if no one call me or given me a ride, i can take care of myself. i don't need people to help me.
laugh of what you want, cause i know they are so fake.. i feel so good to be free to do whatever i want. I no longer have my chain that tie me down. once school is done, let me move out to a better place than here. cause it's useless to live here...more importantly, i can focus more on schools. no more stress~ I AM SO HAPPY!!!
currently listening: pretty girl - Kara
memories brings back happy moments
