Sunday, November 11, 2007 6:36 PM
Today's menu: Had panera's french onion soup for breakfast, a left-over plain porridge for lunch n just Swedish meatballs for dinner.
Today, I was extremely exhausted and so i took a nap for 2 hours. I had this completely ridiculous dream of superman. WAKAKAKA..ok? funny right? I couldn't wake up when i had this dream. I heard my alarm clock, but my eyes were just too heavy to open, till Merry called me.
I went to Blackhawk church today. Learn something good. "It's OK to doubt"
Honestly, I doubt myself a lot. I doubt about my talents, I doubt about my education, I doubt about my love and I sometimes even doubt GOD. Do you doubt yourself? SOmetimes my parents did not believe the talents that I might have. They tell me.."NO" or "You Can't" the more of these phrases, the more i doubt myself, "What can I do then?" I sometimes wonder, if I didn't choose to take business as my major, would I be happy to be a graphic designer? I always have doubt on myself, there's something in me, these little voices in my head telling I can't do it. It pressure me to do something beyond my comfort zone. I even believe it might suppress the hidden talent that I might actually have.
When I doubt about GOD, it's usually when I was testing HIM. I learn that today in my small group. We often test GOD. When I ask GOD something, and I didn't get what I expected, that's when this doubt occur. Luckily, I was able to look back that it was actually my own personal fault.
I also doubt about Love. I doubt about my feelings about someone. Whether it is real or it is just a fling. SOmetimes you don't even know what is love. SOmetimes if you thinking about someone so hard, and hopefully can fall in love with them, i didn't feel that's love. Right now, I really doubt about my feelings. I doubt that now I even care about this particular person. I'm still searching for the answer.
Quote of the day: "Faith is building on what you know is here, so you can reach what you know is there." -Cullen Hightower
Currently Listening: Yuki no Hana - Nakashima Mika (This song kinda reminds me of the past, I don't why, the music let my reflect on my past)
memories brings back happy moments
